Dear Karma Cleanser:
A lady from a local church keeps calling me trying to make me come check out their Sunday-morning casual worship service. It's my own fault, really; a few weeks back, I went to this potluck dinner that the church was hosting for young singles. I'm freshly divorced and looking to meet new people, but I had no idea going to this dinner would put my name on some kind of "come spread the Gospel" phone list. The people were very nice, and I met a couple of interesting new friends that night. But I don't see myself getting involved with the congregation.
How can I tell this lady to stop calling me without being an ass about it? Or, worse yet, do I owe the church some sort of karmic debt for introducing me to these two very cool new people? Is it a sin just to stop taking her calls?
-- Save Me
You should've known from the start that the church would have an ulterior motive for hosting its singles night. Not that that's a bad a thing ... Even the Lord's House gotta pay the light bill. Politely tell the Church Lady thanks, but no thanks. But then again, you might also ask your new friends if the casual service is worth a visit. Can it hurt to try?
Dear Karma Cleanser:
My sister is dating this dude who totally sucks. I can't put my finger on exactly why he bugs me, but he just does.
They started going out right around the time that my boyfriend dumped me. My sister's new man, "Andre," acted like it was my fault that my relationship ended! Meanwhile, he and my sister started spending every night together -- usually with their best friend, Jack Daniel's.
I want to tell her to dump the guy, but I think that would send more bad karma my way -- and I've had enough of that already in the past few weeks. Plus, my sister is younger than me and already resents most everything I tell her to do. Should I just butt out?
-- She Ain't Right
Is it really Andre that you resent, or is it just you reacting to losing both your boyfriend and your baby sister at once? It's natural to be suspicious of the new beau, especially if he's introducing her to that demon liquor. But you've got to let her do her own growing up, and not try to trump her apparent happiness with your own hurt. Maybe the timing of all this does show some bad karmic action coming into play. Sidestep more drama by being the adult here. As our friend Luis always says, "Don't hate. Celebrate."
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