Dear Karma Cleanser:
I'm stuck trying to figure out whether to contact a longtime friend of mine. I'm a new mom (with a 6-month-old son) and I'm severely sleep deprived. So when my birthday came recently, I got a babysitter and resolved to get out and do my thang. I invited two of my girlfriends out to a bar that we used to frequent pre-baby.
Well, the meeting hour soon arrived and instead of showing up at the appointed bar, I was sound asleep in my bed. When my girlfriend called and woke me up to see where I was, I told her regretfully that I wasn't coming. She then proceeded to tell me never to call her again for making her go to a bar that she had to drive 100 miles to get to (an exaggeration, but you get the point). She doesn't have kids yet so she doesn't quite understand my misery.
My question is, was I wrong for not showing up and getting some much-needed sleep?
-- Sleep Deprived
Wrong? Probably not. Rude? 'Fraid so. Your girlfriend should give you the benefit of the doubt, given your situation. But being a baby-mama doesn't excuse you for standing up your former drinking buddy. Your little pukey monster is bound to get in the way of you doing your so-called "thang." Buy your girlfriend dinner and ask her to be patient while you get used to your new life.
Dear Karma Cleanser:
My best friend has been harboring an affection for one of her guy friends while she is having a going-nowhere relationship. She told her guy friend that she liked him. He responded he didn't like her the same way. The next day he called her to say that he's going out with our worst enemy, a drug addict who shall remain nameless. Though he didn't know our extreme dislike for this ... thing ... person ... thing, it hit even harder for my best friend. I'm tempted to do him bodily harm. She, however, is still fond of the guy.
She never told her current boyfriend how she felt, so I think her rejection is a reflection of karma. Is this correct? And if so, is there anything she can do to fix it?
-- Protective Friend
Her situation isn't so much karma as it is bad timing. Sounds like she should have dumped the dead-end boyfriend awhile back and caught Mr. Right before he started dating Betty Ford graduates. Tell your friend to learn from her mistake and lose the loser now. You, meanwhile, remember that this is her battle to fight, not yours. No need to start throwing elbows unless you're personally involved.
Been bad? firstname.lastname@example.org.