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Big Momma's house



In Mozely Park neighborhood, a 37-year-old woman said she was asleep on the couch when her mother woke her up by hitting her with "a bundle of sticks." (It was about 5 a.m. on a recent Tuesday.) Police arrived to deal with the mother-daughter spat. The mother said she was pissed at her daughter and wanted her to move out, pronto, so she went outside, gathered a bundle of sticks, and began striking her daughter. An officer wrote, "I observed that there were several sticks lying about the room." So the officer arrested the 53-year-old mother, who apparently is a supersized gal. The officer used "two pairs of handcuffs to accommodate her girth," he noted. "Despite this, she complained of being short of breath and requested an ambulance." Medics declared that the mother was in fact breathing normally — she was just fine. The daughter said being struck with sticks hurt, but she had no lasting injuries. Big momma went to jail.

Mother's caffeine revenge: In the Hammond Park neighborhood, a 22-year-old woman went to her job at a fast-food restaurant. She was working the drive-thru window when a customer ordered a hot coffee. The woman handed the coffee to the customer, and then realized the customer was an acquaintance of her mother's. Suddenly, the customer threw the coffee, splashing the woman with burning hot liquid over her arms and upper chest. The 22-year-old said she has had ongoing problems with her mother for a number of years now. She said the coffee did not burn her skin, and she didn't need medical attention. But she did file police report on her mother's friend.

Good guys finish ... : A man got a call from a sorta-friend nicknamed "Teenie" who asked him to pay for her hotel room at a Midtown hotel for one night. Teenie promised to pay him back the next day. The man agreed, and booked her hotel room online, using his debit card to pay the $161.25. Minutes later, Teenie called back. She claimed she had checked into the hotel, but the clerk had stopped her and demanded the debit card number before giving her the room key. The man read his debit card number to her over the phone. The next day, Teenie called and vowed to personally go over to the man's home and place the money she owed into his hands. Alas, Teenie never showed up. The next day, $500 was missing from the man's bank account. Outraged, he texted Teenie. The man showed police Teenie's text reply, which read: "Using your car was a mistake and Im truly sorry. Just tell me how much I owe you and I will deposit it or whatever." So the man texted Teenie and said she owed him more than $600. Teenie offered to deposit the money into his account and asked, "Who do you bank with?" The man did not fall for that one. Also, the man noticed charges on his account for two plane tickets from Atlanta to Virginia ($237.30 each). He called the airline, which confirmed that Teenie and another man traveled on that flight.

So now, Teenie is in Virginia and refusing to answer his calls. The man says he really needs the money because he always pays half of his grandmother's rent in South Carolina and she is going to be homeless if he doesn't help. Teenie is described as a chubby woman with freckles, roughly age 29-32, and she lives somewhere in Sandy Springs. She supposedly drives a Jeep Cherokee and a silver Audi.

Baggage claim: In Buckhead, a 54-year-old man said he took his fancy rolling garment bag into the office he used to own on East Shadowlawn Avenue. A few days later, he looked around for his bag — it was gone. (It's a pricey Tumi black bag worth $995.) He asked his staff if they'd seen his fancy bag. One suspect started laughing and said, "I took your bag. It's nice and I wanted it, and what are you going to do about it?" The man said he has no proof that the suspect took his bag, but suspects him "because of the things that he has done in the past" when they shared office space.

Boozy disrobe: An afternoon of drinking convinced a woman to ditch all her clothes below the waist and leave them in a parking lot. On Howell Mill Road around 4 p.m., a 39-year-old drunk woman wearing a yellow shirt and "no pants or underwear" was staggering though a parking lot. She stopped and looked into a silver car, acting like she owned it. The cop walked up and asked: "Does this silver car belong to you?" "No, it belongs to my friend," the woman replied. An untruth, as the person inside the car was freaking out and screamed for police. The half-naked woman was not her friend at all! The drunk woman was jailed on disorderly under the influence charges.

Items in the Blotter are taken from actual Atlanta police reports. The Blotter Diva compiles them and puts them into her own words.

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